Head Or Heart?

Despite being really apprehensive about it, I had a really great time last weekend. Phew!! Meeting my best friend’s boyfriend for the first time wasn’t too formal, which really helped my anxiety. He’s a nice guy. Seeing my best friend for the first time since telling her about everything wasn’t scary at all either. In fact, it had the opposite effect: it gave me more hope.

Am I Making A Mistake?

I’m not sure why, but I feel that maybe I made a mistake after all. Maybe I’m normal and that this is just a phase? Just a slight bit of turbulence in my life, designed to teach me a lesson or to open my mind? Initially, I noticed my anxiety was reduced, which itself caused me to get anxious. Over the course of a few weeks, this blog has become my sanctuary. When I get really bummed out by bad thoughts or feelings of shame and guilt, just knowing I have this blog gives me balance and some kind of peace. But why is that? I know I shouldn’t question it, but I can’t help it. It feels weird. Almost…wrong?